Before having children I figured this phenomenon of "mommy brain" that people talked about was more of a joke than a reality. Rather, that it was more of a mom simply not having time or convenience to remember something, that it had a lot to do with memory. As a new mother though I am reazling the stark reality of the mommy brain phenomenon. Quite frankly it has left me feeling like a complete and utter dolt more times than I can count. Sometimes that is humorous but sometimes it is just down right frustrating.
Dolt: "a dull, stupid person; blockhead" Synonyms: idiot, fool, clod, nitwit, dummy dictionary.com
During pregnancy the most brain-lacking thing I ever did was attempt to put a shirt on for pants. A spaghetti strap shirt. It wasn't until I had it halfway up my thighs did I realize that something wasn't quite right. Even then it took a minute to figure out that this was a shirt and not my pants gone awry.
During a period of life where I was in extreme grief I made a regular habit out of waiting at a stop sign for the light to turn green. Much to my frustration it never did.
So, really it shouldn't surprise me that now as a mother things have not improved. It does. I honestly thought that once these conditions: pregnancy and grief (or insert condition here) were not affecting me that I would return to my normal literate, educated, rather well-spoken self. The person who caught onto things quickly and was proud of her problem solving and multitasking capabilities. Except, much to my frustration, I haven't seen that person in longer than I can remember.
A friend of mine who works in the maternity industry once told me that if a mother doesn't have the best nutrition during pregnancy it is possible that a fetus, or rather the body for the sake of the fetus (aka baby), sucks fat from your brain. Further referred to as brain juice. She mentioned that this brain juice cannot be restored at a later date. Now I'm not sure if this is backed in science, or in any way true, but it is nice to think that it might be. I would like to blame this issue on something that was, for the most part, outside of my control. "Well you see I'm just lacking a bit of brain juice these days, all for the sake of having a beautiful daughter."
Alas the truth of the matter is that my mind fumbles are more due to being a mother. I can honestly say that 98% of my brain power is focused on my daughter and the act of mothering: how safe is she, does she need anything, what if some crazy scenario happens to me or her. That leaves the remaining 2% to focus on the entirety of everything else in my life. That 2% only functions at it's best about 10% of the time because let's face facts when you are hungry, sleep deprived, and generally stressed then you just don't function at full speed.
So friends and family, blog readers, and customer service agents please excuse me when my mommy brain kicks in. If we are having a conversation and all my responses are making no sense because apparently we are talking about two different things then either discreetly get us back on track or just tell me I've gone nuts. I can handle it. After being puked on, peed on, bit, pinched, tackled and more all day, being told that my brain isn't working full speed is not going to surprise me one bit.
The trick of course is to convince the rest of the world, and myself once again, that I am in fact an intelligent, educated, literate, well-meaning woman AND mother.